The Silent Man (Specially for wives)

4225 views 8 replies
Reply to Topic
sun_shine

Age: 121
Total Posts: 13494
Points: 0

Location:
Afghanistan, Afghanistan
Assalam O Alaikum


***Do you understand the silent man? Do you understand why he is silent? Do you know how to deal with him?

Some may wonder if this issue is important enough for me to dedicate an entire article to. Well, it certainly is! Most of the marital problems nowadays arise as a result of a misunderstanding between a talkative wife and a silent husband. Since I deeply care for the family and its unity, I will tackle this issue.

The case here is not about a silent or a talkative person - it is much deeper. It is about two genders which do not understand each other well and, therefore, have many clashes. Sometimes, the clashes are inadvertent and acceptable and at other times they are disturbing and cause much evil.

One of the biggest challenges facing husbands is to be able to understand and properly support their wives when they talk about their feelings. The same challenge faces wives when their husbands choose to have their silent moments.

A remarkable sociologist says that women and men think and exchange information differently. Women think in a loud voice and share their process of inner exploration with an interested listener. Their expressed flow of thought helps them understand their inner-self. This process is totally natural and very necessary in some cases.

On the other hand, men think carefully and silently before they ever speak or give any reply. They examine what they listen to within themselves first in order to give practical answers. This process might take from a few minutes to many hours, which is very disturbing to women. When a man does not respond verbally, it is as if he is saying, “I do not know what to say about this issue at the moment, but I am thinking about it”. However, his wife thinks that he is saying, “I am not answering you because I do not care about you and deliberately ignore you. What you say is not at all important, that is why I am not replying.”

Women usually misinterpret men's silence and, based upon what they feel, imagine the worst possibilities. They congruently measure their own nature and motives to that of men. The difference in natures is the cause of the misunderstanding between men and women.

Women only keep silent when they do not want to talk to someone whom they no longer trust or care to have any relation with. Moreover, they keep silent whenever they feel that what they will say might hurt someone’s feelings. Therefore, they misinterpret men’s silence as hate or ridicule. For women, a man's silence results in their state of insecurity and bad feelings.

Women should know that this is not the case. They should know that when a man is stressed or busy, he automatically ceases to talk and prefers solitude for some time. Men usually do not allow even their best friends to violate their solitude. Therefore, a wife should not hastily think that her husband does not talk to her because she has wronged him. Instead, she should leave him until he gets out of this frame of mind, which usually does not last for long.

This is certainly a difficult lesson for women to understand. When stressed or frustrated, women search for someone to share their troubled mood with. They hate solitude because it doubles their frustration and stress. Consequently, a wife’s persistence in forcing her husband out of his solitude, thinking that this is proof of her care and sympathy, is not suitable for a man. Men do not interpret this attitude as noble. They regard it as an interference with their own business and a lack of respect for their feelings.

Therefore, both men and women should show their care and support for each other with the knowledge of their natural differences in mind. Each should show the kind of care and support that is preferable to the other partner. For example, a wife should not push her husband into talking before he is ready to do so. She should not chase him with phrases like, “Is there a problem?”, “I feel you are not alright!”, “Is something wrong?”, “What is wrong with you?”, “Talk to me! I want to help you!”, “I will not leave you until you tell me what happened and calm down!” etc. Such phrases, though motivated by good intention, provoke men and annoy them, especially if their first reply was, “There is no problem”, “I am alright” or “I want to be alone for a while”.

I am not belittling women’s good feelings which motivate them to care for their husbands. I am merely drawing their attention to the nature of men. I recognize that it is not easy for women to not worry about their men. For women, worrying about the other is one way of expressing love and care. Moreover, I know that women are not happy when the person they love is in pain. However, I advise every woman who wants to deal properly with a silent man to try the following:

Do not belittle his need for a temporary solitude in order to think or reconsider himself.
Do not chase him with solutions or ways for helping him.
Do not chase him with continuous questions about his feelings and mood.
Do not follow him around. If he is in a room, for example, do not enter this room or sit beside him - even if you intend to keep silent until his temporary solitude ends.
Do not get nervous, over- sympathize with or worry about your man. Men like to see their wives have faith in them and their capability of solving their own problems.

These pieces of advice are recommended by sociologists and I suggest we try them.

There is a saying: “Wisdom is the quest of a believer, wherever he finds it he is most worthy of it.”

Peace, Mercy and Blessings of Allah swt be upon you all.
(Article By Amr Khalid)
Posted 02 Sep 2008

Posted 02 Sep 2008

sun_shine says
Assalam O Alaikum

*thanks Alot Sir...!

hamain yeh Article buhat acha laga
so i thought kay Ap sab se bhi share kar laitay hain....!
Posted 02 Sep 2008

ah! now I know what's happening there

Thanks for sharing sunshine.

Amr Khalid! Is he the same Amr Khalid who is a famous Orator from Egypt?
Posted 11 Sep 2008

sun_shine says
Assalam O Alaikum

*Thank You Sir
yaa the same Islamic Orator from Egypt
Mr.Amr khalid mostly on Arab channels...!
Posted 11 Sep 2008

valandrian says
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885bd43885
bd43885
Posted 20 May 2018

Posted 25 Sep 2018

zzyytt says
adidas stan smith ukchristian louboutin shoesnike roshe onegolden goosered bottom shoesadidas pure boostgolden goose shoeschrome heartsair jordan shoesnike air max shoesmonclerirving shoespandora charmsair jordan 6michael korsvans shoessalvatore ferragamo beltadidas stan smith womengolden goose sneakersadidas fluxlebron shoesadidas superstar shoesnhl jerseysauthentic jordansjordan shoespureboostlongchamp handbagsyeezy boost 350jordanscoach outlet handbagsgucci beltssupreme hoodieyeezy boostyeezy boost 350longchampgolden goose slidekd 11 shoescaterpillar shoesmichael kors outletconverse shoeshermes beltsgoyard outletyeezy 700longchamp bagshogan outlet onlinemoncleryeezy shoesgoyard handbagsnike sneakerstimberland outletkobe byrant shoesnike air forcejordan 6canada goose jacketadidas yeezylinks of londonhermes beltslacoste polo shirtstory burch outletlacoste polonike air max 2018goyard walletmichael kors outlet storegolden gooseoff white shoesgoyard totemlb jerseyslebron 16 shoesmichael kors outlethermes handbagsadidas eqtlongchamp handbagsair max 90jordan shoeslebron 16lebron james shoeslebron 16kobe 11yeezyscheap basketball shoesgoyard bag salehermes birkinbape clothingkobe 9yeezy 500 blushcoach outlet storesbalenciaga speedhermes outlet onlinegolden goose sneakersferragamo saleyeezy wave runner 700ultra boostmichael kors outlet onlinelebron shoesmichael kors handbagsoff whiteyeezy boost 350 v2chrome hearts storefenty pumaretro jordansadidas gazelle saleadidas tubular xjordan 4adidas nmd r1kd 10replica rolexlacoste poloyeezy 500kyrie 4pandora braceletlebron 13curry 5jordan 13reebok outletoff white clothingyeezy boostnike epic react flyknitgolden goose mid stargoyard onlineadidas yeezyhermes bagkobe basketball shoesfake rolexhermes birkinharden shoesvalentinoyeezy 500air maxnike air maxhermes handbagsmichael kors salenike cortezfila shoesgoyardyeezyadidas outletchrome hearts outletcrazy explosivemichael kors outlet onlinesupreme clothingpaul george shoesadidas ultra boostoff white jordan 1kyrie irving shoescheap nfl jerseys chinarussell westbrook shoesjordansnike flyknitnike shoesyeezy shoesjordan retronmdralph lauren uknmdair max 270adidas yeezycurry 4michael kors outletkevin durant shoesnike jordansmoncleryeezymichael kors outletgolden goose francycanada gooseyeezynike reactkd shoesyeezyslebron 14birkin bagyeezy shoesbalenciaga sneakersnike lebron 15michael kors outletfoampositescoach outlet storepure boostbape hoodieadidas stan smithadidas ultra boostnike air force 1 lowmichael kors outletmichael kors outletkobe sneakersadidas nmdcoach outlet storenike air maxyeezy boost 350goyard handbagsadidas eqt support advrolex replicanike basketball shoespuma fentyyeezy boost 350 v2air jordan 12gucci beltjimmy choo shoesoff-whiteyeezy boost 350 v2caterpillar bootscoach outlet onlinelouboutin shoesair max 2019kyrie 3nike flyknit traineryeezy shoeslongchampcoach outletfila shoesadidas nmdvapormaxnike huarachenba jerseysmichael korscalvin klein underwearinikilouboutin shoesoutlet golden gooseoff white hoodieyeezy shoesgolden goosetory burchhuaracheskobe 9mbt shoes onlinehyperdunkslinks of london salegolden goosemichael kors outlet onlinefilavans outletmichael kors pursesadidas iniki runnercoach bags saleadidas stan smithbalenciaga triple sgolden goose superstaryeezy boost 350yeezy boost 350 v2balenciagacurry shoeskd 11hermes birkinjimmy choojordan retrogoyard handbagslacoste outletstephen curry shoesair max 2017yeezy shoesjordan retro 13kevin durant shoesnike air force 1coach factory outlethermesoff white jordan 1calvin klein outlettimberland shoescoach outletoff white nikelacoste online shopair jordanshermes handbags tote bagmoncler jacketsadidas tubularnike shox outletcheap jordanskd 11nike shox for womenconverse outlethermes beltrolex replica watchesyeezy boost 350fila disruptoradidas yeezylebron 15yeezy boost 350yeezy boostcurry 5moncler outletmichael kors handbags salesupreme clothingnike cortez womenyeezy sneakersjordan retrooff white hoodiemichael kors factory outletpg 1adidas shoes for menlacoste polonike air force 1 highadidas shoes for womencheap jordansultra boost 3.0michael kors handbagshuarache shoeskate spade handbagsnike air max 90cheap nba jerseysoff white jordan 1adidas tubularfitflops salejordan shoesnike air maxmbt shoes saleadidas ultra boost 3.0balenciaga shoescustom baseball jerseysasics sneakersgolden gooseysl handbagsnike air max 2019goyard handbagsjordan 1 off whiteadidas storenike lebron 16nike roshejordan 11birkin bagjames harden shoesmichael kors factory outletlebron james shoesnike hyperdunkkd shoesvalentino shoesyeezyhermes beltlebron 16fila online shopadidas shoespolo ralph laurenair maxlongchamp handbagsred bottom shoes for womencoach outlet storegoyardhermes birkin bagnike air max 2017longchamp bagsmichael kors outlet onlinehermes handbagscheap nfl jerseysbalenciaga shoescheap mlb jerseyskobe 11kobe shoesgolden goose starteradidas yeezy boostbape hoodieyeezysadidas shoes onlineasics shoesgolden goose saleferragamo beltmoncler jacketslacoste polo shirtscheap jordan shoesair maxjordan 12jordan shoeschrome hearts outletgolden goose sneakerschrome heartsnike outletfila disruptor 2nike polorolex replicaoff-whitejordan shoesyeezymoncler salenike huarachemichael kors outlet handbagslongchampadidas yeezymichael korsbalenciaga speedhermes beltcoach factory outletcheapjordanschrome hearts onlinenike epic react flyknitadidas stan smith menfila shoesadidas inikifila outletkate spade outletyeezy boostmbt shoesnike react flyknitadidas superstarair max 2018hogan outletair jordan 11michael kors handbagsair jordanfitflops sale clearancefilanfl jerseysnike air vapormaxlongchampszx fluxadidas gazellecheap jordansyeezy boost 350 v2coach outletnike reactgoyard bagsadidas nmdgolden goose outletadidas yeezy boostbalenciaga sneakersadidas yeezyyeezy boost 350 v2tory burch handbagsnmd r1huarache shoesnike shoxcurry 4ferragamo beltgolden goose sneakersgolden goose ?
Posted 27 Dec 2018

neha1990 says
divineGroup Musical–the name speaks for itself…mmm, good music! Divine Group
Musical–So Cal’s hottest show band filled with some of LA’s top musicians and
singers–is here to bring you all the music, from the classic sounds of the 60’s
to today’s current top hits.
Since the young age of 15 vocalist Juan Garcia, has treated audiences across
America and around the world to his own unique style of Salsa.
Bands for hire in los angeles 
latin bands for weddings los angeles 
Mariachi Band Los Angeles 
Bandas en los angeles 
Cumbia Bands Los Angeles 
Latin Music Bands For Weddings 
Bands For Weddings In California 
wedding live band In Los Angeles 
popular latin bands Los Angeles 
Latin Bands for hire los angeles 
Grupo Versatil California 
Grupo Versatil In California 
Grupos Versatiles En California 
Grupo Versatil En Los Angeles 
Grupo Musical Los Angeles 
Latin Wedding Bands Los Angeles 
Live Latin Band Los Angeles 
Best Latin Band In Los Angeles 
Latin Bands In Los Angeles 
Hire Latin Wedding Bands 
Latin band for marriage 
Latin band for occasion 
versatile latin band 
professional latin band 
professional versatil band 
versatil band for marriage 
Grupo Versatil 
Latin Band 
Latin wedding band 
Live Latin Band 
Meet us : 101-129 W 1st St, Los Angeles, CA 90012, United States
Talk to us : +1 562-896-6958
Mail us : info@divinegrupomusical.com
Website : https://grandlatinband.com/
Posted 12 Nov 2020

Reply to Topic