...When ever and where ever I close my eyes, she comes in front of me...when ever and where ever i fall in sleep she is mine in my dreams and, if the only possible way we can be together is in my dreams...then i'll sleep forever... Personal Journal of Prem...

1961

This is the first time, I came to USA, just like most of the people said that it is a beautiful country and it is too. Raju asked, but Prem don't you think it will be hard for us to study here, because education is too hard over here. Prem answered, its not as hard as you think it is and we have nothing to worry about, we have no relatives here and no one to talk with...all we came here to do is study...which won't be hard. Raju asked, how long do you wana stay here? I am thinking to stay for 5 years finish High School and move on. They both went to their apartment and start setting it up. They started their High School the next week...

Hey Raju, how's your classes going, because mine are going good and I think after all, this education is not that hard. Raju answered, well yeah you're right, its not that hard but too much homework. Prem said, if you want to be something someday then you have to work hard. In the same hall way, where Prem was walking to his class, he saw Sapna, the most beautiful girl in school and the most respected too. Prem fell in love with her, love at first sight it is...but is she going to love him back...no one knows...and is this the right turn in life for Prem? The time will tell...

One fine day, Prem was sitting in a hall way alone and reading his book, when Sapna came up to him and said, excuse me but you're sitting right next to my locker, so can you move please? Prem looked at her right into her eyes and said, yes i'll move but, how come you're here aren't you suppose to be in the class? Sapna said, well what if I ask you the same thing? No one said any thing, and then Sapna left...Prem couldn't even blink his eyes...

The next morning, everyone was having fun, because no teacher was in the class so Prem left the room, he was walking in the Park, while he was walking under the trees he saw Sapna was on a tree and he was thinking what is she doing? So he went up to her, Hey what are you doing up there, and the second Sapna looked down she fell from the tree but Prem got her and said, thank God I came or else you would've been in a hospital. Sapna replied back, well thanks but no thanks, because its your fault why did you come here and called me and don't worry if you wouldn't be there i would've been fine any ways, because i just fell from the tree not the sky. Prem gave her a smile then he walked to her looked into her eyes and softly he said, you can fall from the sky, you can fall from the tree, but the best way to fall...is in love with me...and then he left...Sapna was just wondering why did he say that...

Well it's not like Sapna forgot about it, but she actually went to Prem's apartment and then she asked him, Prem I wana know why did you tell me to fall in love with you? Prem said, its simple because I love you so much that...when ever and where ever I close my eyes, you come in front of me...when ever and where ever i fall in sleep you're mine in my dreams and, if the only possible way we can be together is in my dreams...then i'll sleep forever...But Prem, if you love me that doesn't mean that I am going to love you...so stop this stuff and get back on studies...because i don't love you but I like you as a good person...Prem said with a smile, it is better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all...you don't love me you have a right...but loving you is like breathing so how can i stop...that's life...

Sapna left him alone, with out even telling that why won't she love him? With out sayin anything...but why? No one knows only time will tell...

When the High School ended, every one was ready to go in college after a long vacation...where Prem was only thinking about Sapna...Sapna...Sapna

But in the whole vacation Prem use to go by her house looking at her and thinking about her, always trying to talk with her...people made fun of him but he never cared...Sapna told him alot of times that she don't love him but he didn't care...so after all that...Sapna finally decided to get engaged with someone else...and then she found her dream man...Rahul who got engaged with the beautiful Sapna...and that day, for Prem life turned into fire and smoke...

Prem didn't went to college, he started smoking and drinking too much...but that didn't helped at all because after every drink and every smoke the only thing that came out was tears...Raju asked Prem, why do you drink, smoke and then all you do is cry...can't you just forget her...and don't let those tears come out, don't show that you are down...Prem said, no Raju you're wrong tears don't make you low or anything, tears are words...the heart can't say. Raju asked angirly, why do you smoke and drink all the time, why don't you take out your pain and get a life? Prem again answered him softly, this is my pain which I take out by smoke, and its life which I get by drinking...
On Sapna's birthday, Rahul got her alot of roses and a beautiful car...where every one else gave her good stuff too, but from Prem only a letter came and there it was written only this... "somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and find in your presence that life is worth while, so when you are lonely, remember it's true: somebody, somewhere is thinking of you" When Rahul read that all he said, looks like a very nice friend...he gave you something i failed to gave you...he gave you words which made your life easier if you would've felt the love in those words...
The next day, Rahul went to Prem's apartment and Prem wasn't there so Raju told him that, you'll find Prem at a bar but I don't know which one. Rahul said, no its ok i'll find that...thanks for telling me. Rahul looked for him and finally he found Prem, and then he went up to him and said, Hi Prem my name is Rahul and I am Sapna's fiancee. Prem looked at him and said, yes I know that and I don't think you know that but you are so lucky you have a good life. Rahul said, yes but I don't know why I think that only you can describe what I want to know. Prem asked, what do you want to know? Rahul answered, I read that little poem you send to Sapna, which really seriously touched my heart...and so you're the only one who can tell me, what is LOVE? Prem laughed and said, so I thought you loved Sapna, but how can you when you don't even know Love...but tell you what,love is when you don't want to go to sleep because reality is better than a dream...but I drink to fall in sleep because for me reality is not better than a dream....
When Rahul told Sapna about Prem's condition and how much alcohol he's takin in, so as a friend she went to his apartment, where she found Prem layin down on the floor...Sapna said, one day I fell from the tree and you saved me, today I came to give you an advise to save you, why do you want to kill your self, why won't you understand it's hard for me and you to be together, this is life Prem, don't let it go. Prem looked at her just like always with a smile on his face when no matter how much pain he's holding back and said,all i have to say is, if you love me, let me know...if you don't, then let me go...Sapna said, I tried to help you, but I don't think you need my help, right? Prem said, yes Sapna don't think about me and don't help me, i mean nothing in your life but always remember this...someday you'll cry for me like I cried for you...someday you'll miss me like I missed you...someday you'll need me like I needed you...and with his last breath and last couple of tears he said...someday you'll love me but I won't be there to love you...and then Prem died...and the last thing he saw, hear