Joke of the Day

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Age: 123
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United Kingdom, United Kingdom
A man walks into a barber shop and asks; "how much for a hair cut?" The barber said $12.50. The man asks; "and how much for a shave?" The barber said $1.50. The man then says SHAVE IT ALL.
Posted 24 Jul 2007

eshajam says
Posted 31 Jul 2007

eshajam says
A Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the,
road....why ?

Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back
from the office
Posted 31 Jul 2007

eshajam says
One day two friends are bragging.
1st friend: My father has great eyes site like eagle, he is very
clever as fox, very brave like the Lion...
2nd friend: This means that I need to buy a ticket to the
Zoo to meet your Father??
Posted 31 Jul 2007

eshajam says
Posted 01 Aug 2007

eshajam says
sadak pe kisi ka exident ho gaya or kafi log jama ho gaye.
sardar g ne kafi koshish ki k marne wala dekhun lekin raash ziada hone ki waja se nakam rahe to shor macha dia ` ` ` ` ` ` ` ` ` `
marne wala mera BAAP he..
marne wala mera BAAP he.logon ne rasta de dia ` `
sardar g ne jaaki dekha tho GADHA mara hua tha.ha ha ha ha
Posted 01 Aug 2007

eshajam says
1 paksitani saudi may road par jaa raha tha os nay diwaar par kuch arabi deki aur osay Choo liya.Wahaa par 1 arabi guzar raha tha us nay kaha ya kiya kar raya hoo.Pakistani nay kaha tum daykhtay nahi Ayat choom raha hoo.Arabi nay kahaa yay ayat nahi.Yay likha hay kay Yahaa Pishaaap Karna Mana Hay

Posted 01 Aug 2007

eshajam says
An Indian guy named "Anantharaman Subbaraman " arrived at the New York airport and ended up waiting for his visa for about 2 hours for the authorities to call his name.

He got fed up and went to them and asked why they haven`t called his name yet.

They said that they have been calling him for the last 2 hours as

"Anotherman Superman"

Posted 01 Aug 2007

eshajam says
                Signs of a Sardar

1) You should be sure the person is Sardar when,

2) He puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to
makeup his mind.

3) Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.

4) Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.

5) Tries to drown a fish in waters.

6) Thinks socialism means partying.

7) Trips over a cordless phone.

8) Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.

9) At the bottom of the application where it says
"Sign Here" he puts "Capricon."

10)Studies for a blood test and fails. sells the car
for gas money.

11)Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.

12)Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said,
"Airport left", he turns around and goes home.

13)Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.

Posted 01 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Posted 02 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Teacher : History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what had
happened in the past.
Student : Please teacher,I don't think I want to study history.
Teacher : Why?
Student : There is no future in it.


Teacher : Ted,if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your
father still have?
Ted : $10.
Teacher : You don't know maths.
Ted : You don't know my father!


Mother : David, come here.
David : Yes, mum?
Mother : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David :But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother : I know that.But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you


Father : Why did you fail your mathematics test?
Son : On Monday,teacher said 3+5=8
Father : So?
Son : On Tuesday,she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday,she said 6+2=8. If she can't
make up her mind,how do I know the right answer?


A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching
TV in the living room. Suddenly,there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then
complete silence. The daughter
turned to look at herfather.
Daughter : It's mummy!
Father : How do you know?
Daughter : She didn't say anything.


Old lady : Doctor,I've got a pain in my left leg.
Doctor (after examining her) : It's caused by old age.
Old lady : Nonsense. My right leg is all right and it's as old as the left leg.


Two men were facing each other on the train.
First man : I know my hearing isn't that good, but I never thought this would
happen. I must have gotten stone deaf. Here you have been talking to
me for an hour and I can't hear a word.
Second man : I wasn't speaking. I was only chewing gum.
Posted 02 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Posted 03 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Posted 03 Aug 2007

eshajam says
This cat, is cat,
a cat, good cat, way cat,
to cat, keep cat, an cat,
idiot cat, busy cat,
for cat,20 cat, seconds cat !...
Now read it without the word cat.
Posted 05 Aug 2007

eshajam says
                   PATHANS NAMES

Born in Jungle =
Sher Khan.

Born in Summer =
Sharbat Khan.

Born in War =
Barood Khan.

Born in Anger =
Ghazab Khan.

Born in Horror =
Haybat Khan.

Born near Ocean =
Samandar Khan.

Born near Garden =
Gul Khan.

Born with Abnormal features =
Ajab Khan.

Born with out Brain =
Shahid Afridi Khan.
Posted 05 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Posted 05 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Posted 08 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Two Sardarjis were in conversation on the beach :
Sardarji 1 :Praaji , Ise 'beach' kyo kaheete hai ?
Sardarji 2 : Tumhe nahe pata ?
Sardarji 1 : Nahe pata.
Sardarji 2 : Woh to Aasmaan aur Zameen ke beech mein hai esliye eesai beach kahete hai .

Posted 08 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Sardarji ( to doctor ) : Doctor, I have a problem.
Doctor : What's your problem?
Sardarji : I keep forgetting things.
Doctor : Since when do you have this problem?
Sardarji : What problem?


What will a Sardarji do after taking photocopies ?
He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes..!!!

What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.


What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you?
Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.

How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears?
Trying to hold on to a thought.


How did the Sardar try to kill the bird?
He threw it off a cliff.


Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.


Why can't Sardar dial 911?
They can not find the eleven on the phone

A sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his friend asks him "kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai"Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkalhai, pata hai ki cinema hai lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "

Posted 08 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Posted 08 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road.

A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver, "where have you been?"

"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.

"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.

"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
Posted 12 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
An airplane is flying over the United States at night.

The pilot says:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the plane is losing altitude and all the baggage must be
thrown out."

A little later, the pilot says "We're still losing altitude, we must throw
anything out that is in the cabin".

The plane continues its descent despite more things being thrown out.

Pilot: "Still going down - we must throw out some people". There's a big gasp
from the passengers!

Pilot: "But to make this fair, passenger will be thrown out in alphabetical

So... A... any Africans on board?" No one moves.

"B... any Blacks on board?" No one moves.

"C... any Coloureds on board?" Still, no one moves.

"D... any Darkies?

A little black boy - asks his dad: "Dad,...what are we?

Dad: " Tonight son, we are zulus"
Posted 12 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Posted 13 Aug 2007

~tasha~ says
Posted 15 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Who i s the Greatest?Cow,Ant & Donkey
A Cow ,ant and a Donkey are DeBating on who is the greatest among THREE of THEM...!!!

So here it goes.....

Cow: i give 20 litter of milk every day and thats why
i am the greatest .

ant: i work day and night,summer and winter,I can carry
52 times my own weight and thats why i am the greatest..

Hello,Why are you scrolling down??
It's your turn now -please speak up..!!!
Posted 21 Aug 2007

May Be says

so many jokes for one day. and no one for today.
Posted 22 Aug 2007

eshajam says
Posted 25 Aug 2007

eshajam says
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, " Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
Posted 26 Aug 2007

eshajam says
There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.

He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."

Sardarji then wrote a note saying:
"I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put Rs.2,00,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the mango tree on the north side of the city playground".

Signed: "A Sardarji".

Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was kept beneath the mango tree.The boy was sitting next to the bag. Sardarji opened up the bag and found the Rs.2,00,000 in cash with a note saying:

"How can a sardarji do this to a fellow Sardarji? Take the money, and Please leave my son."

Signed: Another Sardarji

Posted 26 Aug 2007

May Be says
last one is very nice.
Posted 30 Aug 2007

eshajam says
thanks MB
Posted 30 Aug 2007

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